I was sitting tonight and watching a movie about small town life. The acoustic music in the movie transported me back to a time when I was 18 living in Whitewater which was a small town of 12,000 people living in a house I rented with some other students. I remembered sitting in my living room listening Art Garfunkel singing about my little town. As I sat here in my family room thinking back I had two images juxtaposed in my head- the living room I would sit in late at night in college listening to music and imagining the future and the present sitting in my family room 40 years later listening to my daughter decorating the Christmas Tree in our living room with my wife who I began to date 40 years ago.
The journey that my life has taken leading to the house I'm living in and the family and career I've had over the 40 years was something that I never could have imagined sitting in that living room listening to music 40 years ago. I recently returned from Madison WI from a directors conference and I find it fascinating to sit in a room with so many other directors and talk with them as to how their lives have turned out the way they have. It is so easy to fall into the trap of self importance when you work in a small community and there aren't many other directors who you can compare yourself to.
So what did I learn from going to Madison. The question was raised there as to how many of us thought that our theatre's would fall apart if we weren't there. I know that the Market House Theatre would still continue to operate and to do shows. The question for me is not if it would fall apart but have I made the theatre too co-dependent on me. My willingness to do the design, direction, and so many other jobs to make sure the theatre continues to thrive hasn't created opportunities for others to take on those responsibilities. In my performance review this year it was noted that I needed to let go and delegate more of my responsibilities to others so I could concentrate on big issues facing the theatre. Kristin Williams the other day said I have the same disease she does- "namely I'm too busy trying to keep the day to day things going and not spending enough time looking and planning for the future.
In some ways I think that is how my life has gone. I've been so busy looking at the next project and working on what was right in front of me that I've neglected to do the planning that will allow me to plan for what life will hold for me for the next 10 years. I will only have a short time with Jade still at home before she moves off into the world to begin her life. As I was climbing ladders today doing the lighting for The Best Christmas Pageant I thought about how much longer I can continue to climb ladders. Several of the the theater directors are talking about succession planning. There are a large number of directors my age and older at the conference and we are all thinking about our legacy and the organizations that we leave.
I've come back determined to do a better job of transitioning certain tasks that I do at the theatre. That will require hiring some new and younger staff members to take over some of my day to day duties. Hopefully that will allow me to be more effective in how I can contribute in other areas. I've always wanted to write more and to develop some other shows. I've also wanted to travel more than I have. Letting go of some things can be difficult but I think will ultimately make the theatre a better organization. My challenge will be to find and develop those persons who might be able to help me make those transitions. It's definitely worth trying at the very least!
Friday, November 29, 2013
Saturday, June 8, 2013
Success Leadership and Mountaintops
We've had such a wonderful response to Les Mis. People are raving about it and congratulating the theatre on such a great production. One of the staff told someone that I was basking in the praise. If you know me you know that nothing can be farther from the truth.
I am reminded of Jim Henson and comments he made after the film The Dark Crystal opened. He and his design team had spent 5 years working on this project. They literally lived, ate and breathed nothing but the Dark Crystal for over 2 straight years. They all went to the premiere and it received rave reviews. Everyone was buzzing about the film. The design team all looked at each other after the premiere and then said- Ok where do you want to go eat?
It's kind of like that for me in the theatre. I can pour every ounce I have into a project and then once it opens I'm a little lost. I've completed the project and now I'm kind of at loose ends until the next challenge begins. A friend of mine called me a workaholic. I guess that is true in some ways. Unless I'm creating I'm not sure what to do with myself. I'm already looking over that next hill to see what lies out beyond the horizon.
I also know that I'm a big fish in a small pond. It is so easy to get filled with your success and self importance that you lose sight of what is important. The old saying Cream rises until it sours is a constant refrain in my head. Have I risen to the top and when will I know when I've started to believe in my own self importance more than the larger goals.
Like the Dark Crystal story I know too that fame is fleeting and fickle. It can give you that mountain top experience when everyone loves your work but you are listening to the little voice in your head that says- 2 months from now when the next show opens I have to prove myself all over again. It reminds me of the journey of faith. You never get to stay at the mountain top! You are always on a journey towards it and when you arrive at one mountain top you look over and there is another one that you have to climb. Moses lead the Hebrews to the promised land, he could see it, he could almost get there but because he broke the tablets he was not allowed to enter it. I sometimes feel that way. I can direct and design and lead a cast of people to the mountain top. I just can't seem to get there myself. I'm always leading from the front and then walking to the back to make sure everyone else has made it before I walk back to the front and set out for the next part of the journey.
I think that too often the mainstream religious movements depict heaven as a place you get to and stay there forever in some sort euphoric dream. This may come as no surprise to people who know me, but I can't imagine such a place. Maybe that is why I always turn to the scripture in the bible about the futility of success and the vanity that life brings. You can build huge monuments to the life you lived. You can have a smashing success in the shows you produce. But you can't take it with you to quote a play title.
Living through the middle of my 50's and watching my physical and mental abilities start to be affected by aging has been a humbling experience for me. I can look at people I've known for years and have to search my brain to think of their last name. My brain which has always been for me a rock solid foundation is now tentative and sometimes hard to focus. My physical ability to climb ladders and pull all nighters to get a show done robs me of so much energy that it now takes me days to recover instead of hours. Watching my once strong and proud father succumb to Alzheimer's disease as it robs him of his memories and his body weakens to the point that he must depend on others for his most basic needs is humbling. I know that someday I might be in the same position and it humbles me to know how fleeting this sense of accomplishment and success are.
One of my personal challenges is how to learn how to enjoy the mountaintop while I'm here. To allow myself to breathe and savor the sweetness of success. To sit down in the shade of a tree and rest. To refresh and to find the calmness even though I know I will have to get back up and start lead again.
Success is a difficult thing for me to process. A french philosopher once said. I don't believe in heaven for myself. I believe in it for all of my family and friends without hesitation, but for me I can't see that I will ever make it there. I will always be on the journey striving to get there. For the moment the cast, crew and orchestra of Les Mis have earned a well deserved success. I want them to live in this moment and soak it in with all the accolades they deserve for an incredible job well done. I want them to rest and refresh and to know they have made it.
I'm trying my best to rest and not to feel at loose ends while looking off to the horizon wondering if I am up to the challenges that lie around the next bend in the journey.
I am reminded of Jim Henson and comments he made after the film The Dark Crystal opened. He and his design team had spent 5 years working on this project. They literally lived, ate and breathed nothing but the Dark Crystal for over 2 straight years. They all went to the premiere and it received rave reviews. Everyone was buzzing about the film. The design team all looked at each other after the premiere and then said- Ok where do you want to go eat?
It's kind of like that for me in the theatre. I can pour every ounce I have into a project and then once it opens I'm a little lost. I've completed the project and now I'm kind of at loose ends until the next challenge begins. A friend of mine called me a workaholic. I guess that is true in some ways. Unless I'm creating I'm not sure what to do with myself. I'm already looking over that next hill to see what lies out beyond the horizon.
I also know that I'm a big fish in a small pond. It is so easy to get filled with your success and self importance that you lose sight of what is important. The old saying Cream rises until it sours is a constant refrain in my head. Have I risen to the top and when will I know when I've started to believe in my own self importance more than the larger goals.
Like the Dark Crystal story I know too that fame is fleeting and fickle. It can give you that mountain top experience when everyone loves your work but you are listening to the little voice in your head that says- 2 months from now when the next show opens I have to prove myself all over again. It reminds me of the journey of faith. You never get to stay at the mountain top! You are always on a journey towards it and when you arrive at one mountain top you look over and there is another one that you have to climb. Moses lead the Hebrews to the promised land, he could see it, he could almost get there but because he broke the tablets he was not allowed to enter it. I sometimes feel that way. I can direct and design and lead a cast of people to the mountain top. I just can't seem to get there myself. I'm always leading from the front and then walking to the back to make sure everyone else has made it before I walk back to the front and set out for the next part of the journey.
I think that too often the mainstream religious movements depict heaven as a place you get to and stay there forever in some sort euphoric dream. This may come as no surprise to people who know me, but I can't imagine such a place. Maybe that is why I always turn to the scripture in the bible about the futility of success and the vanity that life brings. You can build huge monuments to the life you lived. You can have a smashing success in the shows you produce. But you can't take it with you to quote a play title.
Living through the middle of my 50's and watching my physical and mental abilities start to be affected by aging has been a humbling experience for me. I can look at people I've known for years and have to search my brain to think of their last name. My brain which has always been for me a rock solid foundation is now tentative and sometimes hard to focus. My physical ability to climb ladders and pull all nighters to get a show done robs me of so much energy that it now takes me days to recover instead of hours. Watching my once strong and proud father succumb to Alzheimer's disease as it robs him of his memories and his body weakens to the point that he must depend on others for his most basic needs is humbling. I know that someday I might be in the same position and it humbles me to know how fleeting this sense of accomplishment and success are.
One of my personal challenges is how to learn how to enjoy the mountaintop while I'm here. To allow myself to breathe and savor the sweetness of success. To sit down in the shade of a tree and rest. To refresh and to find the calmness even though I know I will have to get back up and start lead again.
Success is a difficult thing for me to process. A french philosopher once said. I don't believe in heaven for myself. I believe in it for all of my family and friends without hesitation, but for me I can't see that I will ever make it there. I will always be on the journey striving to get there. For the moment the cast, crew and orchestra of Les Mis have earned a well deserved success. I want them to live in this moment and soak it in with all the accolades they deserve for an incredible job well done. I want them to rest and refresh and to know they have made it.
I'm trying my best to rest and not to feel at loose ends while looking off to the horizon wondering if I am up to the challenges that lie around the next bend in the journey.
Friday, March 29, 2013
Good Friday thoughts
I thought I would take a few minutes at lunch today to write-
As I woke this morning and had my usual Friday meeting with my friend and retired priest Nick this morning we mused over the meaning of Good Friday in the world today. I couldn't help but think about all of the controversy that is running through our country right now, gun control, immigration, same sex marriage, etc.... A few years ago there was a fad that started called WWJD or What Would Jesus Do. I can only image the parables coming from Jesus when asked about weapons and the right to defend yourself.
I grew up owning a Remington 20 gauge shotgun that my father allowed me to buy as a teenager. We went pheasant hunting in South Dakota and deer hunting in Northern WI. I grew up going to the Winchester shooting range and learning to shoot trap and clay pigeons. My father owned a pistol and did target practice. Recently we had to remove the guns from my father who is suffering from Alzheimers and insisted on keeping them loaded and nearby as he became more afraid of the unfamiliar world around him. I found an interesting statistic yesterday. More people die from guns in the home and suicide than of gun street violence. Sadly there are a large number of teens who don't understand that emotional pain can be temporary turn to suicide or violence using guns. As I watched some of the people propounding the use of guns to defend their families and property I wondered What Would Jesus Do?
In the immigration arguments about those people who came here illegally I wondered if my Irish ancestors (Cochran) came off the boat legally? Those people who have migrated for thousands of years to strange lands to find work or opportunity or a better life. Many of whom were my ancestors. Those strangers on the road who were passed by in the parable of the good samaritan. (Samaritan's were immigrants too.) What would Jesus have said to those strangers in a strange land?
Marriage described by one theologian is the process of two rough rocks rubbing against each other until they become smooth. After 30 years of marriage I would bet that my wife would say I'm still pretty rough around the edges. Relationships are hard work and you have to be willing to allow yourself to be hurt sometimes because we certainly hurt those we love more often than not when we try to make them conform to our needs. My first love was a beautiful young woman in high school that was trying to understand her own sexuality. When she bravely told me about her confused feelings I was at a loss. But as I spent an afternoon riding around in a city bus confused and hurt. I turned to a man who was my Sunday school teacher who I ran into by accident while wandering around that day. I do think God was guiding my footsteps. He confided in me that afternoon that his daughter was gay. I talked with him and I understood that if I really loved this girl I had to allow her to be who she was and that meant allowing her to love someone else. I do think that afternoon Jesus was talking to me through that teacher.
On this Good Friday afternoon it seems right to take a moment and reflect on What Would Jesus Do? I don't consider myself as a religious person. I'm not really all that devout. But I'm grateful for at least one day a year when the calendar calls out to me to reflect on the small trials that I face in life and how I respond to those in need and those who I have judged worthy or not.
As I woke this morning and had my usual Friday meeting with my friend and retired priest Nick this morning we mused over the meaning of Good Friday in the world today. I couldn't help but think about all of the controversy that is running through our country right now, gun control, immigration, same sex marriage, etc.... A few years ago there was a fad that started called WWJD or What Would Jesus Do. I can only image the parables coming from Jesus when asked about weapons and the right to defend yourself.
I grew up owning a Remington 20 gauge shotgun that my father allowed me to buy as a teenager. We went pheasant hunting in South Dakota and deer hunting in Northern WI. I grew up going to the Winchester shooting range and learning to shoot trap and clay pigeons. My father owned a pistol and did target practice. Recently we had to remove the guns from my father who is suffering from Alzheimers and insisted on keeping them loaded and nearby as he became more afraid of the unfamiliar world around him. I found an interesting statistic yesterday. More people die from guns in the home and suicide than of gun street violence. Sadly there are a large number of teens who don't understand that emotional pain can be temporary turn to suicide or violence using guns. As I watched some of the people propounding the use of guns to defend their families and property I wondered What Would Jesus Do?
In the immigration arguments about those people who came here illegally I wondered if my Irish ancestors (Cochran) came off the boat legally? Those people who have migrated for thousands of years to strange lands to find work or opportunity or a better life. Many of whom were my ancestors. Those strangers on the road who were passed by in the parable of the good samaritan. (Samaritan's were immigrants too.) What would Jesus have said to those strangers in a strange land?
Marriage described by one theologian is the process of two rough rocks rubbing against each other until they become smooth. After 30 years of marriage I would bet that my wife would say I'm still pretty rough around the edges. Relationships are hard work and you have to be willing to allow yourself to be hurt sometimes because we certainly hurt those we love more often than not when we try to make them conform to our needs. My first love was a beautiful young woman in high school that was trying to understand her own sexuality. When she bravely told me about her confused feelings I was at a loss. But as I spent an afternoon riding around in a city bus confused and hurt. I turned to a man who was my Sunday school teacher who I ran into by accident while wandering around that day. I do think God was guiding my footsteps. He confided in me that afternoon that his daughter was gay. I talked with him and I understood that if I really loved this girl I had to allow her to be who she was and that meant allowing her to love someone else. I do think that afternoon Jesus was talking to me through that teacher.
On this Good Friday afternoon it seems right to take a moment and reflect on What Would Jesus Do? I don't consider myself as a religious person. I'm not really all that devout. But I'm grateful for at least one day a year when the calendar calls out to me to reflect on the small trials that I face in life and how I respond to those in need and those who I have judged worthy or not.
Tuesday, January 31, 2012
Bearings
As I talk to my parents by phone I'm aware of age taking its toll. My father who was once strong and active is slowly pulling in and getting tired easily. When I talk with him, I mask the worries about his health and talk instead about the weather. I try to stay focused on things he can easily converse about and things he can physically do. I talk about how maybe when it gets warmer in Wisconsin he can get back outside again. He and my mother had an active routine of going for long walks. As my father's Alzheimers has progressed he seems to tire much more easily than he used to. My mother told me that even when they go to the mall to walk inside in the warmth he now often says, after only a short time, "I'm ready to go back home".
I've witnessed that on tough days when my teenage daughter struggles with kids making mean comments to her that she comes home at the end of the day and just wants to go to her room. I was struck the other day when she told me that some kid at her school called her a Mexican. I sometimes forget that she is one of only two Asian kids at her school. In this modern age with so many racially blended families, we are still dealing with pockets of prejudice against people who are different from us. It's tough enough to be a teenage girl with all the social pressures put on them by bullying and trying to fit in without the pressures of race. Sometimes she just gets tired and wants to go home. To her room surrounded by the things she knows to get her bearings.
As I was driving the other day I was deeply focused on a problem from work. Not the best thing to be doing while driving. Suddenly I looked up and was lost for a moment not knowing where I was. I began to panic a little. I quickly got my bearings and moved on but I was keenly aware of how fragile my control is over my sense of reality. My father is watching his world disappear and he struggles to keep his bearings. My daughter is moving from childhood into her teenage years and is struggling to keep her bearings. When I am overwhelmed by problems with work and family life and I struggle to keep my bearings.
In this turbulent time it seems no matter what our age, we are all struggling with getting our bearings.
I've witnessed that on tough days when my teenage daughter struggles with kids making mean comments to her that she comes home at the end of the day and just wants to go to her room. I was struck the other day when she told me that some kid at her school called her a Mexican. I sometimes forget that she is one of only two Asian kids at her school. In this modern age with so many racially blended families, we are still dealing with pockets of prejudice against people who are different from us. It's tough enough to be a teenage girl with all the social pressures put on them by bullying and trying to fit in without the pressures of race. Sometimes she just gets tired and wants to go home. To her room surrounded by the things she knows to get her bearings.
As I was driving the other day I was deeply focused on a problem from work. Not the best thing to be doing while driving. Suddenly I looked up and was lost for a moment not knowing where I was. I began to panic a little. I quickly got my bearings and moved on but I was keenly aware of how fragile my control is over my sense of reality. My father is watching his world disappear and he struggles to keep his bearings. My daughter is moving from childhood into her teenage years and is struggling to keep her bearings. When I am overwhelmed by problems with work and family life and I struggle to keep my bearings.
In this turbulent time it seems no matter what our age, we are all struggling with getting our bearings.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Moonlighting
I haven't posted in this blog in almost 2 years. Part of that was a self imposed exile because of too many things going on in life to try to keep the blog going. In other ways I was also finding that I imposed a certain restriction on myself to not make any statements about faith or my observations on life because they might be misinterpreted while I served on certain boards or were engaged in certain civic projects. I've missed writing and feel like I'm ready to start poking my head back up, looking around, and trying to sort through the things I see in life, work, and faith by putting them into a written form. I know that a couple of my friends have been after me to get back into the writing mode. Thanks for the encouragement and I'll be posting again soon.
Michael
Michael
Monday, February 8, 2010
final episode
I haven't written in over a month. Since Christmas I have been overtaken with several projects. I've also been absorbed in watching something that I received as a Christmas present and last night I finished the final episode.
I happened to hear the interview over a year ago about the final episode of Battlestar Galactica and it sounded intriguing. I purchased the first few episodes on itunes and then got hooked. For Christmas I received the entire series in a box set. 26 discs in total.
As I have watched these episodes unfold it was like reading a book. Each episode was a continuing chapter in the story of the human race and its struggle to survive and understand what it means to be human. You need to forget all about the old 1970's series that this one used as a basis. This is also nothing like the old Star Trek series or others like it with a weekly episode that wrapped up neatly. This series is about the nature of God, man and machine. This series also came along at a time when I wasn't directing a show so that was how I spent most of my evenings the past month and a half.
I am so appreciative of the creative team that put the series together. Their writing and their probing really touched a nerve in me. So as I move on beyond this series that has absorbed my life in approximately the same time that it takes to rehearse and perform a play I find myself asking the question of what to take with me as a part of who I am. Each play that I work on always enriches my life. Not just the collaboration that happens with the people but the story of the play itself becomes incorporated in my consciousness. I often think about how much of our life is made up of the stories that we read or that we view that were created by a writer or storyteller. I know that parables, plays, movies, books, all can transport me to a place where I can look not only at the culture and the world but at myself.
The final episode of the series talks about how things keep repeating themselves over and over and yet there is hope that at some point there is the chance that things will turn out differently. We as humans won't continue down the path of self destruction. Our science and our technology far outpace our heart and our ability to make sense of it all. But even with incredible technological feats what we all reduce down to is the need to be loved and the need to connect with others. The series didn't answer all the questions it raised. Some characters never reveal to us who they are or what they are. We are left with only small glimpses of what is the truth and if we are honest with ourselves what we have told ourselves is the truth.
This past several weeks I've watched as friends have passes away, long time friends health slowly slips away, a new year begins and all the challenges it brings with it. I've watched as people in the series and in my life have seen all of their hopes and dreams turn out to be a false illusion and have to turn around and pick themselves back up again and set out again on a new path. Family members have come home to care for others and then had to leave to begin life again on their own. I've seen people who refused to give up and others who refuse to get up. I've seen people who have carried the burden of so many for so long fall down and only want to have peace, yet when duty called they stood back up, picked up the load again and set out a new course.
I used to scour every book I could get my hands on hoping to find the ultimate answer that would make sense of it all and I would live happily ever after. Lately it is the stories of others and not the philosophy or the theology books that seem to carry the most meaning. Each moment, each story of our life and the lives of others seems to hold that ultimate answer if only we can puzzle it out.
We get so caught up in the demands and the distractions of our lives that we forget the story that we are a part of unfolding with our every breath. That life is a constant discovery and a journey to an unknown place.
One of the characters in final episode said that after a lifetime of fighting and struggling and pain and heartache all he wanted told himself that he wanted to do was to find a quiet place and do as little as he possibly could and just enjoy the life. Yet as he looked around, after all he had been through, he found that his heart was calling him to climb mountains and to explore the oceans. The final episode is always the beginning of a new chapter in another story. A new story of creation that is as old as the beginning of time and continues for eternity.
I happened to hear the interview over a year ago about the final episode of Battlestar Galactica and it sounded intriguing. I purchased the first few episodes on itunes and then got hooked. For Christmas I received the entire series in a box set. 26 discs in total.
As I have watched these episodes unfold it was like reading a book. Each episode was a continuing chapter in the story of the human race and its struggle to survive and understand what it means to be human. You need to forget all about the old 1970's series that this one used as a basis. This is also nothing like the old Star Trek series or others like it with a weekly episode that wrapped up neatly. This series is about the nature of God, man and machine. This series also came along at a time when I wasn't directing a show so that was how I spent most of my evenings the past month and a half.
I am so appreciative of the creative team that put the series together. Their writing and their probing really touched a nerve in me. So as I move on beyond this series that has absorbed my life in approximately the same time that it takes to rehearse and perform a play I find myself asking the question of what to take with me as a part of who I am. Each play that I work on always enriches my life. Not just the collaboration that happens with the people but the story of the play itself becomes incorporated in my consciousness. I often think about how much of our life is made up of the stories that we read or that we view that were created by a writer or storyteller. I know that parables, plays, movies, books, all can transport me to a place where I can look not only at the culture and the world but at myself.
The final episode of the series talks about how things keep repeating themselves over and over and yet there is hope that at some point there is the chance that things will turn out differently. We as humans won't continue down the path of self destruction. Our science and our technology far outpace our heart and our ability to make sense of it all. But even with incredible technological feats what we all reduce down to is the need to be loved and the need to connect with others. The series didn't answer all the questions it raised. Some characters never reveal to us who they are or what they are. We are left with only small glimpses of what is the truth and if we are honest with ourselves what we have told ourselves is the truth.
This past several weeks I've watched as friends have passes away, long time friends health slowly slips away, a new year begins and all the challenges it brings with it. I've watched as people in the series and in my life have seen all of their hopes and dreams turn out to be a false illusion and have to turn around and pick themselves back up again and set out again on a new path. Family members have come home to care for others and then had to leave to begin life again on their own. I've seen people who refused to give up and others who refuse to get up. I've seen people who have carried the burden of so many for so long fall down and only want to have peace, yet when duty called they stood back up, picked up the load again and set out a new course.
I used to scour every book I could get my hands on hoping to find the ultimate answer that would make sense of it all and I would live happily ever after. Lately it is the stories of others and not the philosophy or the theology books that seem to carry the most meaning. Each moment, each story of our life and the lives of others seems to hold that ultimate answer if only we can puzzle it out.
We get so caught up in the demands and the distractions of our lives that we forget the story that we are a part of unfolding with our every breath. That life is a constant discovery and a journey to an unknown place.
One of the characters in final episode said that after a lifetime of fighting and struggling and pain and heartache all he wanted told himself that he wanted to do was to find a quiet place and do as little as he possibly could and just enjoy the life. Yet as he looked around, after all he had been through, he found that his heart was calling him to climb mountains and to explore the oceans. The final episode is always the beginning of a new chapter in another story. A new story of creation that is as old as the beginning of time and continues for eternity.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
Year of Stories
I got up this morning and flipped on the news. They were discussing New Years Resolutions. I flipped the channel over to HBO and they had the Bucket List on. Okay two things that are trying to tell me to make a resolution on what I want to change or things I would like to accomplish in the new year. That's a tough question. There are lots of little things that I can always name easily that I would like. Lose weight. More time to write. More time period for the things that I love to do. Spending time with family and friends. But after watching the Bucket List I took a moment to try to figure out some bigger goals. That's a tough one.
I know that during Spring Break we will go to Disney World for Jade's first time ever. She is really looking forward to that. I had one of my biggest goals two years ago when I went to New York and saw shows on Broadway for the first time ever. When I was in school I always thought I would travel the world. Adopting my daughter allowed me to see China including Beijing, Hong Kong, and a layover in Tokyo. Traveling doesn't' seem to be a realistic goal at the moment. Financially everything is pretty tight. One of my goals I've had for several years now is to end the year with less debt than I started it. I was able to achieve some of that but life didn't really cooperate towards the end of the year with having to repair and replace a couple of big ticket items like plumbing systems, appliances and automobiles.
As I thought back over what I went through in 2009 I thought about how the year began with my father in the hospital as 2008 ended and my worries about his health. The ice storm took most of my focus for two months in January and February. I was pretty stressed both mentally and physically and in February ended up spending a night in the hospital because of a pain in my chest. Then I helped judge the local competition for America's Got Talent and helped select Kevin Skinner. I went right from that into The Wizard of Oz and that kept me busy until the July. We had Jade do some testing to see if we could help her with her school work and that took sometime to work through and we are just now able to make a plan to help her. A short summer vacation back to see my family and then back to work on Smoke on the Mountain Homecoming and Tom Dick and Harry. Through all that my shoulder has been keeping me in and out of the doctors office and I finally got a procedure scheduled for next Monday. In the meantime I strained my left shoulder and elbow trying to compensate for my right injured shoulder. I didn't start out with any new years resolutions in 2009 and lots of things happened.
Maybe it's best if I don't start out with any resolutions in 2010. What I think about is that most of life takes place in the stories about what happens to us while we are doing the everyday things. For me last years stories were about family, weather, work, money and trying to stay healthy. I have a feeling that many of the stories that will come in 2010 will be about the very same things. I feel very fortunate that I get to work in a career that tells stories. Many of my personal stories last year and the stories that I helped bring to life in the theatre helped to give a way to appreciate what life means. After 4 years of Education for Ministry class the one thing I learned was that we are still experiencing the same basic stories that were written thousands of years ago. While the details may be different the themes are the same. The search for love, for respect, for meaning are still just as consuming now as they were then. As we take in a story about someone else we realize, how much more alike we are than how different. The stories that inspire me are how we pick ourselves up and start again after we get knocked down. How we learn how to smile and sometimes even to share a laugh in the midst of pain. How we learn how to find love by giving it away when it hurts to give it with no expectation that it will be returned. And how we learned what it meant to be a friend, a father, a husband, a brother and a son and not talk but listen to the stories that someone else needs to tell.
A year from now I hope that when and if I'm able to sit down and think about resolutions for 2011 that I will have lots of new stories to tell.
I know that during Spring Break we will go to Disney World for Jade's first time ever. She is really looking forward to that. I had one of my biggest goals two years ago when I went to New York and saw shows on Broadway for the first time ever. When I was in school I always thought I would travel the world. Adopting my daughter allowed me to see China including Beijing, Hong Kong, and a layover in Tokyo. Traveling doesn't' seem to be a realistic goal at the moment. Financially everything is pretty tight. One of my goals I've had for several years now is to end the year with less debt than I started it. I was able to achieve some of that but life didn't really cooperate towards the end of the year with having to repair and replace a couple of big ticket items like plumbing systems, appliances and automobiles.
As I thought back over what I went through in 2009 I thought about how the year began with my father in the hospital as 2008 ended and my worries about his health. The ice storm took most of my focus for two months in January and February. I was pretty stressed both mentally and physically and in February ended up spending a night in the hospital because of a pain in my chest. Then I helped judge the local competition for America's Got Talent and helped select Kevin Skinner. I went right from that into The Wizard of Oz and that kept me busy until the July. We had Jade do some testing to see if we could help her with her school work and that took sometime to work through and we are just now able to make a plan to help her. A short summer vacation back to see my family and then back to work on Smoke on the Mountain Homecoming and Tom Dick and Harry. Through all that my shoulder has been keeping me in and out of the doctors office and I finally got a procedure scheduled for next Monday. In the meantime I strained my left shoulder and elbow trying to compensate for my right injured shoulder. I didn't start out with any new years resolutions in 2009 and lots of things happened.
Maybe it's best if I don't start out with any resolutions in 2010. What I think about is that most of life takes place in the stories about what happens to us while we are doing the everyday things. For me last years stories were about family, weather, work, money and trying to stay healthy. I have a feeling that many of the stories that will come in 2010 will be about the very same things. I feel very fortunate that I get to work in a career that tells stories. Many of my personal stories last year and the stories that I helped bring to life in the theatre helped to give a way to appreciate what life means. After 4 years of Education for Ministry class the one thing I learned was that we are still experiencing the same basic stories that were written thousands of years ago. While the details may be different the themes are the same. The search for love, for respect, for meaning are still just as consuming now as they were then. As we take in a story about someone else we realize, how much more alike we are than how different. The stories that inspire me are how we pick ourselves up and start again after we get knocked down. How we learn how to smile and sometimes even to share a laugh in the midst of pain. How we learn how to find love by giving it away when it hurts to give it with no expectation that it will be returned. And how we learned what it meant to be a friend, a father, a husband, a brother and a son and not talk but listen to the stories that someone else needs to tell.
A year from now I hope that when and if I'm able to sit down and think about resolutions for 2011 that I will have lots of new stories to tell.
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